The B Flow

And damned impressive too, great work (if real) by these Alabama defense attorneys [link courtesy of one Charles von Althann].  Without further ado, here is the “Best.  Motion to Continue.  Ever.”

This motion was filed yesterday in Jefferson County, Alabama. Enjoy. And, obviously, Roll Tide!

Comes now Jon B. Terry, as one of the attorneys for the Defendants and would move to
continue the current trial setting of January 4, 2010 and as grounds therefore would aver as
follows:

1. This case was set for trial several months ago before certain monumental events occurred
that were beyond the anticipation of the attorneys and the clients.

2. Since the setting of this case, one of the two great college football teams in this State has
reached levels on a national scale that have not been enjoyed by any team in this State in 17 years next preceding the date hereof.

3. Currently, one of the two great teams in this State are playing for a national championship
and has enjoyed an undefeated season and clinched the SEC Title Game.

4. Most of the attorneys representing all of the named Defendants have tickets and reservations to be in Pasadena on the 6th day of January, 2010, which date would conflict with the trial date as travel times and schedules for the game overlap the trial as currently set.

5. In fact, the Honorable Jim Lloyd has children that live in the area and is scheduled to be
with them in California to celebrate the game and the Tide s success.

6. Attempts to resolve this conflict directly with the Plaintiffs has been unfruitful as the
reply has been that they are for the other great team in this State who did not make the playoffs.
Unfortunately, that response remains short-sighted as they may one day find themselves in the
same position that the Defendant attorneys are in and, unfortunately, the BSC Title Game is no
longer scheduled on January 1st, but has been moved to January 7th.

7. In checking with your Honor s Office, it was determined that there are potential quick
dates available during March, the only known conflict being that Jim Lloyd has recently been
elected President of the Birmingham Bar and must attend a conference on March 10-12. Other
than that, the Defendants can be ready to be first out during any available week for trial during the month of February, March, or April and believe that there would be no harm, considering the
magnitude of this event and its impact on this State, and the fact such an event only comes
infrequently during a person s lifetime and is an achievement of such a magnitude that all
involved in this litigation should want everyone to fully participate in this achievement.

8. It is also understood that many of the witness involved are trying to acquire tickets to the
game and/or scheduled to be at the game in Pasadena on January 7th and certainly any juror
selected to participate will likely be preoccupied and not able to devote their full attention to the
case before them during the week of January 4, 2010, and therefore, the parties would be
prejudiced by the distraction caused by such a major event of such significant importance to so
many people in this State.

9. ROLL TIDE!! ( although my secretary is for the other great team of this State, she feels
that I need to attend this championship game!); and may the Longhorns be defeated.

______/s/ Jon B. Terry________________

JON B. TERRY
OF COUNSEL:
BAINS & TERRY

You could probably start here, with some Authentic Tim Tebow Tears.  Sweet.  The whole experience was also immortalized by YouTube here.

A snippet of what to expect:

Up for sale is an actual vial of Tim Tebow’s tears. These tears, squeezed from multiple tissues and shoulders at the Georgia Dome, may not be the last tears we see from Tim Tebow, but they may certainly be the most valuable to any and all Gator Haters throughout the world.

After being held to 13 points and being unable to score any points in the entire second half, Tebow let these tears fly, just like his chances of winning the Heisman or another National Championship as a senior. His red zone interception during the third quarter likely sealed the Gators’ fate, ensuring Alabama’s shot at the BCS National Championship game.

Here’s some information about these tears, how you will receive them, and what they can do for you:

> These tears will come in a glass vial similar to the one shown in this aucition’s pictures. Due to the volatile nature of Tim Tebow’s tears, finding a recepticle to contain these tears can be unpredictable, but it is important to know that you will be getting actual tears from the ducts of #15.*

> Though little experimentation has been done on these tears, early studies have shown that these tears may have the ability of non-surgically circumcising a child as well as returning one’s virginity upon dousing.

>  The Vial of Tim Tebow’s Tears makes a great Holiday Gift for Florida State, Georgia, Alabama, LSU, Tennessee, and any other Gator hating fan.

If you have any questions, please feel free to ask on the listing!

Oh, and lot’s of this – the 12 to 25 second mark being the highlight.  To be fair to Timmy lovers everywhere, he was dating this consolation prize, which, you know, is okay.